I want to be more passionate
Many of you know that I abandoned a stable well paid corporate lawyer type job to start a yoga studio and you might be surprised to know that I a couple of months ago I set a goal to be more passionate and more courageous. To me passion is when you throw your whole self at something, you express every aspect of who you are. Passion releases all of the energy you possess, and the scary part is, that when you put your whole self into something ALL your weaknesses and short comings are exposed...big time! You put your self on the line.
I have gone far enough into this thing to conquer some significant obstacles and definitely revealed some personal weaknesses too. But to be completely honest with you guys, until now I feel I have held my passion in check a little because I disliked aspects of myself and I feared being exposed. I kept my passion in check because I wanted to feel safe. Your can't be passionate if you are closed, you can't be passionate if you are hiding. I shared this with you, because I think so many of us feel scared to pursue what we love and we don’t really know why. Why is it so scary, why do we opt for the mundane instead? Its because when we really apply ourselves to something wholeheartedly we have to allow people to see us as we really are, we are naked, we are revealed and it scares the shit out of us because we aren't perfect!
People generally fit into 3 categories
when they pursue something
1. The go far enough to meet the first obstacle and bail out
2. They go far enough to conquer some obstacles
3. They give everything and face every obstacle thrown at them until they conquer them all
I’m not sure about you, but in most things I fall into category 2. I think because failing, or falling on your face when you are trying really hard at something looks bad, it feels embarrassing, like we were wrong or silly for trying. We loose the image of success. Its the same feeling that holds people back from trying an arm balance in class, they don’t want to fall on their face and be judged. We have probably been hurt, ridiculed by others in the past and we fear failure and we fear judgement. The thing is, that passion looks good on the inside and actually it feels freakin awesome. But you have to be prepared to let go of the image of success, or to at least risk losing that image. Don’t attach failures to your sense of self. You won’t feel satisfied if you are worried about how you look to others.
Don’t juge your outward success to early, it takes time to get good at things. Don’t bow out too early. Instead, look to assess your conviction, your passion and your courage.